Christmas turned out just fine after all.

After all my stress about getting ready for Christmas and mustering up whatever Christmas magic I could, it all turned out great despite my worrying. I managed to get up a cute little tree and some stockings.

And that is about it for decorations. On Christmas Eve we had a small dinner with my sister Rebekah's family and actually watched about half of the movie Rad that my brother in law Sean found on Youtube. Nothing says Christmas like a good 80's movie. 

On Christmas day we woke up and opened the presents we got for each other and the gifts my parents spoiled us with. We always say we are sticking to a strict budget but we end up spoiling each other. I did not really even create a Christmas wish list because life has just been busy and I have not been thinking about it that much. Sam was so sweet and for like the last 6 months he had been creating a list of things I had mentioned that I wanted or would like to have. So even though I did not really give him any ideas he surprised me so many cute and wonderful things. What meant more than the presents did was how thoughtful they were. That is what makes presents great. 

After a quick breakfast we headed over to Sam's parents. We got to talk to Sam's little brother Joe who is on a mission in Ohio. We got to talk to Joe for about 2 hours! We talked with him through facetime so it was cool to actually get to see him. I think he was a little homesick but he is doing great and is starting to become more and more comfortable as a missionary. Since most of my family was all gone somewhere else we just spent the day with Sam's family. We ate delicious food and we were thoroughly spoiled by Sam's parents. We watched a classic Christmas movie and just lounged most of the day. Pretty much all of us were sick so it was nice to just relax.

Overall it was a pretty great Christmas. I had a big realization that even if I do not do any of the normal traditions I love about Christmas, it will come anyways, and all you can do is just enjoy it. That is precisely what I did. Even though we were spoiled with things I really felt that this Christmas was not about the gifts at all. I realize that is really cliche but it is just so true. I am mostly just grateful to have family (especially when you spend a holiday without all of them). I am grateful to have Sam's family to spend the day with. I am most grateful for Sam who has taken care of me while I have been sick this whole month. He is so thoughtful and just being with him made it a wonderful day. Now I get to look forward to my birthday, the new year, and getting back to normal, or at least the life I consider normal :)

Merry Christmas!

It's really not beginning to look like Christmas at all.

This time of year everyone is eagerly anticipating Christmas and are finishing up the final touches on gift wrapping, decorations, and Christmas parties. Well, that is not the case for me and Sam. I have pretty much done nothing to get ready for Christmas and it is a little depressing. I love holidays. I mean LOVE. I love the planning and all the excitement. I love Christmas lights and decorations. I love turning on Christmas music while I hang ornaments on the Christmas tree and hang lights around all the windows. I have done nothing. Not one twinkling light.

The reason for this lack of holiday cheer really started with Thanksgiving, which we also did not celebrate this year. Well we did, just not on Thanksgiving. On Thanksgiving day we headed out with my brother Matt's family to help them move to their new home on Bainbridge Island just outside of Seattle. Even though we had a big Thanksgiving dinner the Sunday before, it was still a little weird knowing everyone was sitting down to a nice turkey dinner when I was driving through western Idaho. We were lucky enough to stop at my grandparent's house and my Grandma made us a delicious lunch with a little pumpkin dessert. The saddest part of the day was when we made it to our stopping point in Baker City, Oregon. We went in search of a place for dinner and not one place was open. NOT ONE. Not even McDonalds. Where did we technically eat our Thanksgiving dinner? Maverick. Yes, that is right. We ate Maverick gas station food while watching the Price is Right in our hotel room. My niece Leah may have shed a few tears that night, but the kids were really big troopers and they never complained. 

We finally made it to Seattle the next day and helped Matt and Debi move everything in to their new house, which is super cool and in such an amazingly beautiful place. I am not going to lie, it made me think of moving the the beautiful northwest someday. We spent the weekend with them in Washington and then had to say a sad goodbye to their family and head back to reality in Utah.

I say back to reality because being in Washington was really relaxing for me and as soon as we got home that meant we had to move as well. We are going to be moving into Matt's house now that he is gone. Here is the deal. My parents are moving into the upstairs of Matt's house and they are selling their condo. We have now moved out of Bethany and John's house (since they are now back from Massachusetts and Bethany is pregnant with twins!!!). So now we have moved in to Matt's basement and will be living with my parents. Are you confused yet? I don't blame you if you are. Anyways... we left Seattle late Monday night, and had to get back to work the next day. We then spent a crazy tired week packing and moving little by little all week while trying to paint our new bedroom.

Unfortunately I came down with a cold last weekend, and unfortunately that cold turned into bronchitis. And unfortunately I also caught a case of pink eye two days ago. So I finally made it to the Dr. and finally made it back to work after being out for 3 days. Let's just say I am grateful it is the weekend. But I am still surrounded by unpacked boxes with no Christmas cheer in sight. My goal is to get into the Christmas spirit, decorate a Christmas tree, and buy some presents no matter what this weekend. Oh did I mention that we are helping my parents move tomorrow? Let's just say I am a little tired of moving.

Even though the holidays have not been very conventional for us this year it has also really put things in perspective for me. Between Thanksgiving and now I have had a hard time feeling holiday magic and cheer, but I have been trying to really focus on the true meaning of Christmas. I keep trying to tell myself that the decorations are not that important and that there is no need to feel any stress about not having any of the traditional Christmas things done. I am trying to focus on the fact that I will get to spend time with family. I am going to focus on the fact that Sam only has one more week of school and then I will get a lot more Sam time for the next three weeks. Tonight we are going to the Mormon Tabernacle Choir Christmas concert and I am so excited that I get to hear about the true message of Christmas in such a beautiful place.

So hopefully I will recover from all the sickness soon, get a tree up, eat some peppermint ice cream and eggnog, and try to feel a little Christmas magic soon. I have a feeling that even with all the craziness in my life, it is going to be a great Christmas either way.

And all of the sudden life got busy.

I think it is funny because I have gone back and looked at my posts from the summer, and man I must have been bored. I think I was wallowing in the frustration of life because I had a lot of time to think about how frustrating life can be. Well not anymore. Since I have started back up at my job and with Sam being full time at his job plus at school, not to mention all the other little things that make us busy, I don't have time to think about those things as much. I thought that before the holidays hit I better do an update before things get REALLY busy. And since this blog is really for me more than anything else, I really need to get everything down before I forget.

Well Summer was good, but long, and difficult when you only really work 9 months out of the year. So I was happy for September to come. The month of August was crazy busy. I watched my sister Rebekah's kids for 2 weeks so she could take a CNA course during the day. Needless to say we were both ready to be done with that (not that I don't love my crazy little nieces). Then we took a quick trip to Idaho to visit my grandparents. They really put us to work by hauling logs, digging ditches in the horse pasture and leveling a part of their garden to make a horseshoe pit. But we are always glad to help them out.

I finally started work and I am grateful to be getting two pay checks again, although it really does not feel like we have any more money, it just feels like we are spending more. Well September was great and October was even better. We took a lovely trip to visit Bethany and John in Massachusetts. A trip to New England in the Fall? It really can't get any better. Here are a few (okay a lot) of pictures.

Yes we walked 294 steps up to the top of that thing.

Things we did that may or may not be pictured above: See the Fall foliage in New Hampshire, visit Hanover (where I spent my summer as a camp counselor), walk the Freedom Trail in Boston, eat clam chowder and delicious authentic canolis, drive to Connecticut, drive to NYC, see the 9/11 memorial, sit on the 2nd row of the Late Show (and be on TV for like 2 seconds), eat real NYC pizza, see Times Square, go to Cape Cod, go to Boston Harbor, see Plymoth Plantation, drive to Rhode Island, eat lobster for the first (and last) time. It was a great trip. But we were pretty tired by the end and ready to go home. Thanks Bethany and John for the great time! We couldn't have done it without you!

Then, a week after returning from out lovely vacation, I ran a half marathon with my sister Rachel. Well to be more correct I ran half of a half marathon with her. After that point I let her go on ahead without me (I am a really slow runner). I kept on running until about mile 8 I reached a nice steep hill and had to give into walking. I kept on running after the hill, but then got two giant blisters on each foot that basically made the last 5 miles total misery. Even though I felt like a 109 old woman by the end, and had to walk about 3 miles of it, I crossed that finished line in which I proceeded to cry into Sam's chest and claim that I will never do that again. Thanks Rachel for pushing me to train and to do something that showed how far I can push myself. 

This is what I came home to after the race, sweet huh?

We had a wonderful and thankfully quiet Halloween. All we did is eat delicious Fall themed food, pass out candy, and watch Wait Until Dark as we cuddled on the couch. It was a great end to an amazing but very busy October.

Well a lot of other things happened in the last 3 months like my niece Izzy getting baptized, hosting a get together with my friends, and a college friend reunion, lots of family get togethers, birthdays, etc. 

Now time to move on with the past and look to what is ahead. We are happy to say that we will be moving at the beginning of December. We are moving into the basement of my brother's house in Centerville. Sadly that means they will be moving. My brother accepted a job in Seattle. Sam and I are going to drive up there to help them move, so we get to squeeze in another little trip (kind of) before the end of the year. My parents are going to sell there condo (anyone interested?) and live in the upstairs of the house while we live in the basement. We are excited for the change and excited for the Holidays. Well I think that this post is long enough don't you? Until next time. Happy November!

We have a baby, a baby cat.

We are crazy people. Now we have a crazy little cat. A kitten. Sam named her Nala. She is adorable and she tries to bite my feet and hands all the time. We love her already and at the same time I am seriously debating my lapse in judgement that caused me to take her home. On the 24th of July we just happened to stop by at Dick's market. We heard a meow. A loud meow that I had heard before. Flashback 4 years ago. I was on a walk in Logan and heard a little black and white kitten meowing at me from across the road. I took him home. I gave him to my brother-in-law. No harm right? I gave a helpless kitten a good home. Well now I am living with this kitten and his name is Moe. And he is the biggest butthead cat. So why on earth would I ever take in another stray cat? Well I did. And I didn't even have to. We are not the ones who even found the kitten at Dick's. Another family found her and were carrying her around looking for her owner. It was my idea to take her without even seeing her first. When we opened up the box and saw her cute little face and gray striped fur we fell in love. Especially Sam. He is such a softie. So there you go. Meet Nala.

The problem that we did not realize is that adult cats don't really like kittens. We thought, hey, we already have 3 cats, what is one more? Well apparently it is a big deal. I don't think one of the other cats really likes her so we have to keep her in a separate room and only let her out when the other cats are not around. It is kind of a pain. But over time hopefully things will get better and if all else fails she will grow up and be able to hold her own against the other cats. She came from the streets after all. It is a big responsibility but I figure if we can't raise a cat then what hope do we have at parenthood? So here is our first test and I hope it is successful. Either way, Nala is now the third member of our little family.

Patience

This last week at church we had a lesson in Relief Society about patience that really rang true to me and my life. I am positive that I am not the only one who feels this way but sometimes it just feels like I am. Something that Sam and I have been struggling with is the problem of the waiting game. We are always saying to each other "when such and such thing happens we will be happier" or "when we have such and such things our lives will be easier." I have realized that our whole lives we are simply waiting for the next thing to happen to us and thinking that life will get easier or better when those things happen. Ever since I have finished school and got married I have been struggling with this a lot, I mean A LOT. I guess it just feels like I did my time at school (twice), I went off and did some adventurous things, I dated a few weird boys before I found the right one, I have had about a dozen different jobs and moved about two dozen times to various houses and apartments. This problem I think can be summed up into three different parts:

The first: I am not a college student anymore, but still live a semester to semester life because of Sam. Even though I don't have homework anymore, I still feel the stress of deadlines and midterms, but I can't do anything about it. Confession: one time I actually wrote a paper for Sam and it felt great. It is so hard because Sam is studying Spanish and business and I can't help him with either one of those things. I just feel like I am in an eternal school waiting game. I can't wait for the day when tuition is no longer an expense and all my student loans are paid off as well.

The second: That awkward place where everyone around me is a parent and I am not yet. Sam and I are the only couple in our ward who do not have kids. We have only been married a year and I think I am the only one who is pressuring myself about this issue, but I still feel the pressure. I think part of it is that I am around kids pretty much every single day, but they are other people's kids. I want to be around my own kids, I just don't have them yet. And because of things like problem number one, I feel like it will never happen.

The third: I am not in college, I am not a mom, and yet I do still not have a career. One giant frustration this summer has been trying to find a teaching position. I have not been successful yet. After 5 interviews and many tears after being rejected every single time, I have been left very confused and frustrated. When I went back to school I really felt like it was the right thing to do and it seriously NEVER occurred to me that I would not find a job. The moral of the story is to not go into social studies education without and ESL endorsement or without being a coach. Let's just say I have some bitter feelings against coaches lately.

With those three problems weighing on my mind daily I keep living in the past, worrying about the future and feeling unhappy with my life, which makes me feel like an ungrateful crazy person. A piece of truth: I do have a good life, a great life! I have an amazing husband who loves me no matter how crazy emotional I am. I have a family who supports me. I do have a job to go back to during the school year. I have a comfortable home to live in. I have all the things in my life that I really need. So what is my big problem!?

I guess this whole post relates back to the lesson I had on Sunday. It related perfectly to how I was feeling and truly was an answer to a prayer. I realized I have had the answer all along, which is just to be patient. I have been trying really hard to enjoy my life in the moment and to accept things as they come. I am trying to be grateful for what I have and for where I am in my life.

One Amazing Year

Yesterday Sam and I celebrated our very first anniversary. Sometimes I think, really? It has only been a year? It feels like I have known Sam my whole life. Sometimes I forget that he has not been with me through my whole life and we have really only known each other for about two years. Marriage is so amazing that way. There is no one in the world that knows me best and that I am more comfortable with. We actually celebrated on Saturday since our anniversary was on Sunday. We went and saw the play Ragtime, which I thought was pretty good, and then we went out for a delicious dinner at Olive Garden. It was a pretty simple way to celebrate, but let's face it, we are too poor to go and do something big and grand. At the end of the day we went on a little walk around the capital, which is where we had our first date. It was a beautiful night. I feel like I have learned a lot about myself and about marriage over the past year. So here is a list of ten things I have learned. 

1. Communication is everything. It doesn't matter what it is about, but you have to communicate. Men are not mind readers and if we don't say what we want, they will never know. 

2. It is okay to disagree, and even fight, as long as you always work it out. Sam and I have had some big fights (probably because of me), but the important thing is that we always work it out. Sometimes it is better to stay up late to work it out, and sometimes it is better to go to bed and sleep on it. There is really no one thing that is best, it really depends on the situation you are in.

3. Couples who say that they have no problems are either lying or are not in reality. I have learned that it is okay to not be perfect and to not compare myself to other couples. There is no way you can make it through life with no problems, it is better to learn how to deal with those problems together instead of pretending they don't exist.

4. Take time to have fun. Sam and I have so much fun together. We both like to do different things, but we have found things we both like to do together. I sometimes think I could just hang out with Sam for the rest of my life and I could be okay with that. We are best friends.

5. Decide what is important to you and what you can overlook. For example, Sam never puts the cereal away in the morning, and it annoys me, but I just have to get over it. I always leave my shoes all over the house and it annoys Sam, but he just gets over it. Those things are not important to me or him so even if they are kind of annoying, we don't make a big deal out of them. But we are able to be vocal about the things that really do count.

6. Be each other's advocate. Don't use the workplace, your friends, or your family to complain about your spouse. When you talk about your husband or wife it should not always be negative. Take your problems to your spouse and work it out with them instead of bringing everyone else in as well. I try really hard to talk positively about Sam and to be his advocate.

7. Don't forget to be romantic. Even being newlyweds, every married person knows that it is really easy to get in a routine and not take time to be romantic every now and then. So go watch the sunset together, open a bottle of sparkling cider, go on a date, hold hand on the couch, whatever, just be romantic as much as you can.

8. Speaking of romance, don't forget to hug and kiss every single day. There is nothing better than having loving arms to come home to, so take advantage of that. Sam and I take time every day, no matter how tired we are, to give each other a hug and a kiss at the beginning and the end of the day, and usually in the middle too :)

9. Keep spirituality in the home. Take time to pray together, to study the scriptures, to go the temple, and keep good things in the home. We have had so many blessings throughout our entire relationship and I know that this is one of the most important things to having a happy marriage.

10. The last, and one of the most important things I have learned is to put Sam first. This sounds so simple, but it is so hard sometimes. I have discovered that any time I feel like there is a problem or that I am feeling bad about something it is because I am thinking about how it affects me or how I am being hurt. But when I put Sam first it opens my mind up and I feel so much more compassionate and loving. When we both do this for each other we end up helping each other out so much more. Seriously, it truly works and it reminds me of how much I love Sam and how important he is in my life.

There are way more than 10 things to making a marriage work and that I have learned over the past year, but this is just a blog, not a novel. Marriage is hard work, but the reward is beyond measure. I can't describe how much love I have for Sam and how wonderful being married to him is. We may be poor and not have all the things we want and we are far from perfect, but at the end of the day when I look at Sam as we are falling asleep and fall in love with him over and over again. I am so blessed to have him in my life. I love you Sam. Happy one year!

I am bad at blogging

So let's just face it. I am a horrible blogger. I try to take inspiration from other people, but I just can't seem to keep up with this thing. So while I continue to keep posting blogs, I make no promised of how frequent. Part of the reason is that I have been crazy busy as of late. I have started teaching 5th grade and it has sure kept me on my toes. About 2 1/2 weeks ago I showed up to work and the office told me that the teacher I am long term subbing for was going into labor. Luckily she had prepared me pretty well so I was able to just pick up and take over the class. Really it is going well, but there is just this weird transition phase where I am trying to get all the grading that she left caught up (something I did over the weekend with the help of wonderful Sam). Also she didn't really leave me lesson plans, which is totally ok, but I have never taught 5th grade before so sometimes I just feel like, what the heck is going on? It's not my ideal teaching situation, but I am beginning to think there is no such thing. So I have been busy, and to top it all off we have end of level testing this week. I just hope I don't totally ruin the kid's test scores with my lack of preparing them. So far we have one test down with no major headaches.

I feel like since I have taken over this class life has gone by way to fast! Every day cruises by and it is 5 pm before I know it and I still have mountains of things to do. When I get home I make dinner and after that it feels like it is time for bed already. The thing is that even though I am tired and busy and I feel like I never get to see Sam anymore, who also just started going full-time at his work, I am not that stressed out. I am trying to learn to just relax and not get worked up over every little thing that happens at school. That does not mean I don't get worked up over things... just not school things. This experience has taught me a lot about how to be a teacher and is so so so much better than student teaching. So life is busy, but life is good. Sam is done with school for the semester, my sister Bethany is coming to visit for 2 weeks today, my neice Leah  gets baptised on Saturday, the weather is warm, my garden is weeded, I have a husband that does dishes and takes out the trash (with some reminding). My life is good.

Spring Break was mostly a success

Well it is good old Monday, which means that Spring Break is unfortunately over. I am not going to lie, it was hard to wake up at 6 am and go to work today. But it also wasn't too bad. It is nice to get back into a routine and to be making money again instead of sitting at home worrying about it. So I am sure you are all wondering, how did I do on my Spring Break goals (okay, okay, you probably forgot all about it). Well there were some things I did not get to. The desk is not cleared off. But to my defense I organized a ton of stuff and completely organized all our files. Also, half of the stuff on the desk is Sam's and I have no control over his organization. So the desk was not a success but I organized my things on it. I also did not finish my menu plan, but I realized that it was a pretty huge undertaking and I feel good about it because I have a menu for this month and it has been a pretty good success so far. So it's not finished but a work in progress. The one thing I truly did not touch was the wedding thank yous. So they remain a nagging little thought in my mind.

Despite not completing those things, I still got a lot done. For instance, look at this sparkling dresser, I bet you don't even recognize it!

Remember how it used to look like this? Well no more!

And remember how I said I was going to plant all my seeds? Well I did. And here they are. I had to bring them inside because of the looming wind storm.

I had all sorts of things from onions to tomatoes to flowers. I also planted some seeds directly into our garden. I can't wait to see the little plants poke up from the soil!

Look at my tiny little lobelia starts!

And my lonely little jalepeno plant. Isn't it so cute? I think so.
Also, I worked out (for reals) three times this week, plus Sam and I went on numerous walks. Now I just need to keep it up this week. I also just did a ton of organizing off all my craft stuff and old papers that needed going through. I spent a lot of time with family and watched wonderful General Conference. The week was great and it was the relaxation I needed before my taking on a class of 5th graders. It could be any day now that Mrs. Eddy (the teacher I am substituting for) has her baby. For sure I will start next week, but she is not sure if she will make it until then. It kind of freaks me out that I could just start any day now. I kept thinking what if she went into labor at school? I sure hope not for both our sakes.

Spring Break!

Well people I am officially on Spring Break. It is about 90% good, and about 10% bad. It is mostly good because let's face it, a week off a work is always a good thing. But there is a down side because I don't get paid for a whole week and because Sam is still in school and has work so it is just me hanging out by myself all week. I don't really like being home alone all day. I am already home alone all afternoon until Sam gets home from work, but I like that because it gives me time to do whatever I want. But all day? That is a little too much. I am sure people with crazier lives than me or with a bazillion kids are puking right now because my big problem is too much free time. But I don't feel bad. I realize my life is not really that hard and I am totally living it up. One day I will be working full time and then we will have kids and I won't have time to breath, so I totally am enjoying this life of mine with zero guilt. However I don't want to waste my life away sleeping or watching TV so I have set a few goals for myself and I will let you know how I do at the end of the week.
#1 Organize my dresser
This is how my dresser looks right now. Yes it is a little embarrassing but I am hoping that making it public will give me more incentive to clean it.

#2 Organize out desk
This is how our desk looks like right now and this is actually after we "organized" it so we had room to set up our printer.

#3 Work out, I mean really work out, at least three times this week. People, I am at an all time low in laziness. Both Sam and I are. It is sad. We picked up leaves all over our yard on Saturday and both of us have super sore hamstrings from all the bending down. It's pathetic really. There is no excuse this week!

#4 Finish planting all my seeds. I am trying to start a garden from seeds and it is halfway working out. I think this deserves its own post but it is still part of my goals this week.

#5 Finish my menu planning for the month. This also deserves its own post and when I am done I will post all about it because I am super excited about it.

#6 Mail out the last of my wedding thank-yous. There are seriously only like 15 more that I don't have addresses for. And I finished the bulk of them months ago, but there is just that little stack that I know is sitting in a box, on the desk, just waiting to be mailed. They need to go, and this is the week.

Okay, there you go. My six goals this week. You are probably thinking, really? Come on Kayla you are home all day, these things should be easy to finish. But think about it. Some of these things I have been putting off for months. You know those things that you have in the back of your mind all the time but you seem to always have something more important to do instead. I am giving myself until Saturday to finish all of these. So far I have not done much, but it is only Monday right? (says the voice of a procrastinator) So on Saturday you will get the final update. Wish me luck!

Oh and isn't this the cutest thing? They are brother and sister and they like to snuggle (when they are not trying to swat each other in the face) and it is adorable. Yes I keep posting pictures of cats, yes I realize that is lame, but wait until you have a pet and then you will understand.